Ah, grad school – how I dislike thee, let me count the ways. A great many of my friends have been very encouraging of my return to the University of Utah to finish up my Master’s program. Thank you all for that I also am interested in finishing and getting my degree so that my life can have some forward momentum. My M.A. degree will be integral to achieving this. Plus, I don’t like to quit and leave things unfinished.
But, grad school! I had forgotten how much I despise writing papers. No, not forgotten perhaps, but subjugated it to my latent ambition while reapplying. Now it returns to the fore. In addition, it had also slipped my mind how much I had enjoyed playing patty cake with university administration, particularly financial aid. Sitting here broke and avoiding my landlord, I await the money authorized me, but temporarily denied due to a technicality that the office had neglected to mention almost to the point of scrapping the whole thing. The ignominy of having to drop out because of “those” people. Yes, the joy – you can almost imagine the smile on my face, can you not?
Thirdly, I am not a fan of grad students. Don’t get me wrong, I think a majority of them are very good people and a few are even my friends. However, I rarely get to meet such pretentious egos in such confined spaces. I do not think of myself as pretentious, but perhaps those that know me will vote another way. The root of my view is no doubt founded in how I approach history. I look at what is being said about what. Theory is my weakness and I often ignore the many and varied arguments over it that my fellow students seem to revel in. For example, I was in a study space where a certain book was being discussed and evaluated. It was a narrative and detailed one at that. The lack of theory or the little in the way in which to point to a theory was pointed out with a certain disparagement of its merit. I no doubt would have read it and found it a damn fine book. I hope this helps you understand my issue – fundamentally, my lack of interest in historical theory is detrimental to my being a history graduate student, much less a professional academic.
This is why I am so interested in government work. Political theory has only killed people in the hundreds of millions, so a lack of interest in that should not be an issue there, right? Fortunately or unfortunately, however you may prescribe to it, I actually enjoyed political theory.
Yesterday, I experienced that feeling of ineptitude that generally comes with the first day of class in a new language. A new alphabet and vocabulary to wrap myself up in and beat my head against the wall over. I had been glancing over the Korean alphabet haphazardly for a couple of months and have been amazed at the simplicity of it. I realize that looking at it from the first few times that it will not be as simple as it looks, but I have on rose-colored glasses from the decade or so that I have been memorizing Chinese characters.
There were many times in China when the question was posed to me, “What do you like about China?” The answer to that was always easy for me. I love the people, the food, the culture, and the history. When I am feeling generous and am not beating my head against the wall in frustration, I can even admit to loving the language and its place – valued in ways both the same and different than I value my own mother tongue. As I said, this question was easy as I loved and love China. It was the inverse question that always made me uneasy, for it was always inevitable. I had a response, of course, but how does on say it tactfully in place where tact is an utmost virtue. However, I must answer honestly. What do I hate about China? The Government and the Party.
Well, I thought that I would put up another update. I have finished off two of the three papers that I had left over from my last semester at Utah. I hope to finish the third one this weekend. I will be so happy to finish these idiotic things off – I should never have let them progress this far. Writing block, how I curse thee! Once finished, it will be time to focus on the dreaded thesis. I can only be thankful that I did as much work on it as I did before I folded.
This holiday weekend has been one of highs and lows for me. It started out pretty well when I had Thanksgiving at my Aunt Madge’s house with my cousins Mike and Renee. Renee’s kids were there as well as Aubrey, her granddaughter. I had a great time talking with all of them and eating the food. We had turkey, stuffing, green bean casserole, and several other delicious dishes. After that, I went over to my Dad’s and talked to with him and Darlene. I then went to John and Marianne’s house. Jason and DeAnne had arrived from Biloxi, so I got to hang out a little with everyone at John’s. It was a good day although I did get a little irritated. My only brother that I didn’t get to talk to was Doug, who was coming back home from his trip to Gatlinburg. I will see him and everyone else on Dec. 10th though.
Oh, last week….what a week it was. LSU and the Saints dominated their opposites. First, let’s begin with LSU. They destroyed Auburn. 393 total yards to Auburn’s 248. Defense was magical. Claiborne and Brookes, Mathieu’s replacement, stepped up and definitely met expectations. This shows that even without the Honey Badger and Ware, we have depth on both sides of the ball. Both Lee and Jefferson each threw a beautiful TD pass to Randle. It seemed like everyone on the team got a chance to rush the ball. Four ball carriers, even without our starter. That’s right, I said 4. A couple of hits on special teams will still be felt three generations later, I’m sure. LSU ended the game 45 against 10 for Auburn, the biggest spread in the history of our many meetings. I carried the glow from this game through half the week. The chant at the end said it all – We want BAMA! Another week until 
I know that this is a late post, but I have to put it out there. Last weekend was equal parts estascy, equal parts misery. First, as I have always done, lets dispense with the misery. I had a nasty sinus headache that came on Sunday and stayed with me till Monday. I had been house-keeping for my dad and think that Jolie’s ample hair (my step-mother’s dog) affected me as I haven’t been around her this much since I moved out. The bad part of it was that I missed work. I really hate missing work as we are a bit short-handed now.
What a good weekend! First, I worked on Saturday, allowing me to make a little money and further guaranteeing that I will be able to eat for the next two weeks. Also, I found out that I had lost 8-9 pounds, after 3 to 4 months being virtually the same weight. Being poor is the best diet I have ever been on. Later that night, I no doubt ruined it as I went to my dad’s to watch some football and eat grilled hamburgers. I think my dad finally has the hang of cooking burgers without burning them. Go old man!